Don't Let Your Eyes Leave Mine
by JokaJoker
Summary: SPOILERS on the Persona Be Your True Mind game Ellen does some thinking on Main


Don't Let Your Eyes Leave Mine **Don't Let Your Eyes Leave Mine**  


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This is Ellen's perspective on the game [Be Your True Mind arc]. I'll admit I'm not too fond of her, and that I like Mary and her equally, but hey - if Mary leaves Main for another guy after all the shit we got dragged through, I think Ellen deserves mroe points than Mary ever will - though I can't really say I hate Mary since Jun's kind of the Mary character in IS. 

This story makes more sense if you've finished Persona and Persona2 EP. 

This is kind of depressing, but not - ya know? Anyway, I've written a follow up - "I Can Smile For You", which wraps things up nicely. I'll admit all my endings suck, but hey, it's an ending. 

I used the American names because most people probably haven't played the Japanese version. 

+++ 

They found me. 

I didn't think that they would actually look here this early in the situation, but here they are. I'm nervous, so I'm acting all giddy - hoping that none of them will see my true face. 

None of them notice, they think I'm brave and irritating, but I'm secretly keeping an eye on him. And then I see it. He's looking right at me. I know he's watching. 

He's always been laid back. Calm, cool, and collected - no wonder everyone clings to him, looks up to him, and depends on him. No wonder I love him... 

But I keep quiet, I think he notices. 

His eyes look directly through mine. Can he tell that I'm scared? Does he see it in me? 

I think so since his eyes soften in the way I noticed every now and then. He's actually very kind. Sure, he's aloof, but he's really not apathetic. He cares, he's just...him. 

He looks at me and silence consumes us. Everyone is wondering what's going on. 

"Let's go together," he says. 

And that's it. 

He says very little, but whenever her does, it always has some greater meaning to it. 

And so, nobody will question him. 

I look at Mary from the corner of my eye and I hear her say, "Why did we come to the subway anyway?" 

She seems upset, and unlike her normal tone - though she does snap at times - she does seem more irate than normal. Did she notice? 

He ignores her - well, I'd like to think so, since I know we're both after him. I can't believe I only figured it out. No wonder things hadn't worked out with Bruce. 

Nobody else made any rude comments to me, I wonder if she really is jealous? 

She doesn't mind me the whole way we exit the subway. 

Not that I would ever be too surprised if he chose her over me - everyone loves Mary - heck, even I do. She's emotional and high-maintenance at times, but she's Mary. And I guess that's all that counts. 

The more we get into this; I just have to ask him... I have to know if he... But I'll wait until after Chris leaves - at least then I'll have a reason to ask such a prying question. 

"...Important people... You..." I blabbler on, then wait nervously for a reply... 

Silence, as usual. Until... "Not here." He actually answered me! 

"I..." I begin apologizing. I shouldn't have asked such a question. But he's the same, he doesn't seem bothered by it. "...We're both very much alike," I finish. Then I have to mentally grimace - what am I thinking?! That's only possible if we both like each other and can't say it out loud... Oh... I'm hopeless. 

We leave the art room and continue making our way through the maze that was once St. Hermlin high school in this other world. And later, once we've found Selena, Mary says she's got an eye on somebody else. I almost hit the floor. No... No... 

No wonder everyone but those two were turned to stone... 

I look away, and then look up because I have to look at him. I almost gasp, he's looking at me? 

Before I can make any coherent thought, we're leaving the Karma place. 

Mary...everyone loves her. She can paint and she has friends everywhere... Sure, they love me too - but it's because of my looks... 

I sigh. Yeah, so what if I look good now - in thirty years, I'll be forgotten. Mary will always be her sweet self. But with me... 

I don't know. 

Nobody ever gave me the chance to find out. It was always: "Ellen, you're so beautiful. Ellen, you're face is so nice. Ellen, do you do your own hair? Ellen... Ellen..." 

But it was never "Ellen, I need your help." 

No... Obviously, I was too shallow. 

Maybe, I am. 

Because at the Pool of Mind and Souls, Philemon wouldn't let me go - I couldn't be with him. 

Those were the longest minutes of my life. 

But they came back. He looked shocked. Did he think she was just being mean to me at the subway? Didn't he know how she felt? 

Everyone was too busy with themselves - they didn't even bother to comment about you. …Only about Mary and how she was. 

Not that I mind, I like her. Like I said, this WAS _Mary_ after all. 

But, then we found out the reason to the way things were was because Mary wanted it that way. Could it be that she was actually consumed by so much hatred, passions, you name it, that she would do such a thing as create her own reality that we could be sucked into? That she could do such a thing? Could she have been jelous of me...because of me the person? 

It's mind boggling, but it happened. 

No wonder she wasn't turned to stone at the Karma place, and why Selena was jealous of her to that extent, and...and everything else that happened... Poor Mary... 

Though now, my perspective has changed slightly. How could she do this to use and just go after another man? 

But he doesn't mind, I can tell since I'm always watching him. 

But I think it finally hits Mary, because after Nate leaves, she urges me to tell him of my success. 

Yeah, so I'm a model - but do you love me? 

He smiles, and then we make a promise. But...are you only saying this because I'm so shallow. ...Because of my looks? 

Or...are you wishing me luck in finding myself. I'm bitter and I know it. 

You...don't go - take me with you! I never want to leave your side! I don't want to do it again! First, I went to go to school overseas, and then you left at the Pool of Mind and Souls...but - no, not now! Now would be too long! I might never see you again! 

But, I don't say that. And you're gone... 

So now I'm off to be a model... Normally, I could smile it off, but... You're gone. Everyone's gone. I'm alone. People will only look at me for my looks. I'm...I'm... 

I can't even be Ellen. 

+++ 

Abrupt, but - it's probably a better ending than anything else I can come up with at two in the morning... Tch - stupid muse! Ahh...if any of my stories have any grammatical errors, tell me about it! ::sweat drop:: I'm such a kid... Oh, and all the quotes I've taken from the game, well, I tried to match them as best I can with the original words, but I jus' forgot since I've already beaten the game, it's hard to go back and do it again. 

06.08.2001 JokaJoker 


End file.
